Pregnant woman Kryptonite

What is it about first trimester symptoms that come back for more than a cameo in the third trimester?! I was running errands and at one of the check outs they had a box of Cinnamon “brooms” – cue the urge to projectile vomit upon smelling them. WOW. I haven’t had a reaction that strong since the beginning joys of pregnancy. Clearly my pregnant super powers are returning with the sonic sniffer complete with the dynamically attached gag reflex. If only I didn’t know what my kryptonite was… cinnamon brooms.


What is it about baby stuff?!

Ever since I thought we figured out what car seat we wanted and then managed to purchase I thought we were through with the “must have” baby stuff. Books, crib, clothes, diapers to start out and car seat – Should be good – to at least get things kicked off. I think I have too much time on my hands and I also should admit that I am just a little low emotionally. These canyons are sorely lacking in ladies that I’d want to hang out with…

Maybe I should just cut myself off from craigslist. But it really has been a fun spot to check out all the baby gear that parents are trying to unload. Lots of interesting stuff in general – which is why I ended up buying an Orbit G2 complete system for less than $400 bucks today. What am I going to do with all the little things?! Bassinet, rocker, stroller seat for later on. Right now I have no idea. Maybe the set wont live up to the hype. That’s one of the downsides as a first time paranoid recovering infertile pregnant woman… you dont know and then you worry…and then you worry and research some more.

I like that the system “turns” and you can check straps and then move them into position. I like how it locks. It seems like if you are going to leave the kid in a unit that at the very least you can move it around some. Good news is there seems to be a ton of parts that we can order! Will share feelings once it all gets used.

8 weeks to the carpool lane!

I was driving out a little ways to pick up a stroller/car seat/bassinet system (cause of course I can only think that we “might” need this) when I got a little glimmer of positive pregnancy out come in Southern California – 8 weeks away from being able to use the carpool lane!!!! He’ll be a person just a small one for now.

Come on carpool lane!

What NOT to say to an almost 8 month pregnant woman…

I was walking the dog with the huzz down our canyon the other morning and ran into a lady that was in one of the yoga classes that I have been to… I didnt remember her name but she knew mine and then asked how we were doing in “the little house with two dogs.” It was nice conversation until she got to the “”you dont look so big…you carry like I did just real wide on the bottom…” I was a little stunned and wanted to ask if she was trying nicely to say that I have a large ass compared to the belly that leads me where ever I go but I refrained. I may be sleep deprived, emotional, swollen and down right grumpy but I can still smile and wave while saying fuck you with my eyes.

Wide on the bottom…

Over the birth plan already! 2nd pass

I cant believe the time it takes to put a damn birth plan together. How many ways can I say that I “want, would like, prefer, please ensure, how bout NO…etc.” It’s crazy. And for all those English major’s out there I never professed to be a grammatically correct writer. But I do not want to write a novel. I just want to get out the highlights of what we might like to experience for this upcoming birth. No checked boxes and no long involved explanations. Without further diatribe here is version 2 of the birth plan:

Our journey to this pregnancy has been a long and unexpected road. In some ways I think we never thought that we would have the opportunity to be parents. The last time we were in a hospital was over two years ago and we were dealing with a painful and scary emergency ectopic surgery. As soon-to-be parents we do have first time “labor and delivery” fears but they won’t stop the process from moving forward! So we’ve put together our birth preferences below but are painfully aware that things rarely go as planned. If and when complications arise, we request the least invasive treatment possible and informed consent before interventions.

Labor and Delivery

Hoping for a natural childbirth – I will make every attempt to be receptive and flexible during this time.

Unrestricted movement – we will bring a birthing ball.

Avoid artificial enhancement of labor with pitocin, amniotomy, or otherwise.

Natural water rupture.

I prefer to not have an episiotomy – as a matter of fact they terrify me.

Mirror might be interesting for birth – although I may never get the visual of my vagina opening like Stargate out of my mind.

Will be open to “taking the edge off” of labor with pain medication but I wont know until we get there.

Immediately After Delivery

Skin-to-Skin contact

Delayed cord clamping – prefer the cord stops pulsating before it is cut.

Husband to cut the cord – if he hasn’t passed out.

I am requesting to have the “Golden Hour” with our newborn.

Physiological delivery of my placenta – placenta to be saved.

Please delay standard newborn procedures for as long as possible to allow bonding time with our baby.

Baby Care

I plan to exclusively breastfeed the baby. No bottles, pacifiers or glucose water.

Please no eye drops, vitamin K shot or hepatitis B vaccine.

No circumcision.

When time for his first bath I’d love for my husband to have the opportunity to do so with the organic products we will provide.

In the event of an unplanned cesarean birth (c-section)

My husband to be present and allowed to take pictures.

Please utilize my non-dominant arm to give me a completely free arm to touch my baby.

ECG leads to be placed on my back, to make my chest free for skin-to-skin contact.

A non-drowsy, anti-nausea med if possible (i.e. Zofran)

Request that the sheet be lowered during the last part of delivery so that I can watch my baby being born.

Immediate skin-to-skin contact with my baby.

Please use double-layer sutures when repairing my uterus!

Delay my baby’s first bath until the second day of life so that I can get breastfeeding and bonding off to a good start.

Opportunity to breastfeed ASAP.

We are extremely grateful for the the medical expertise of staff who may need to intervene at any given time and would like to share our sincere thanks for all your assistance. I realize that as a medical professional you experience the miracle of birth daily but these moments for us will be a series of “firsts”. We would be remiss if we did not express our gratitude for all that you do both big and small during this grand adventure.

Note: I am allergic to sulfa drugs, latex and doxycycline.

Soontobemother panic – book buying

I have avoided baby “things” up until the 7th month… everything until I felt like I really had to start preparing for the little one’s arrival. In a panic this week I realized that we had no baby books – as in NO BABY READING MATERIAL. I am a book fiend by nature and read every chance I get… I was completely relieved to find that SoCal has a few $1.00 book stores and I spent the last 3 days stocking our horizontal book shelf with books. I am still short some classics but have managed to find almost a complete set of Dr. Suess, Beatrix Potter and Winnie the Pooh… how can you go wrong with those?! I feel like I have spent more time on dr’s and hospitals, cribs, gadets and whatnot – missing the all important “book factor”…

What was I thinking?


Things that dont happen in Colorado

I feel like starting a whole new blog entitled “things that dont happen in Colorado…” because some times the crazy in California is just that. Got to love living in a canyon. Other than the overwhelming canyon political crap that is swirling around Modjeska (folks are passionate – I get it – but dang put down the slander and personal insults.) The latest as-the-canyon-dries-out-in-a-drought saga is the setting up for the Annual Silverado Country Fair –

Someone has been damaging the road signs and silently waging war on the passionate canyon folk who are preparing for their weekend of fun by vandalizing the rest. That should set the stage for today’s things that dont happen in Colorado –

Evidently an axe wielding man chopped down the newly repair fair signs (on both entrances to the canyons) and then headed to our canyon to chop his way all over an RV that was parked on the side of the road… and then he attempted to run down the witnesses on the scene. I was somewhat relieved to find out that it was only ONE axe wielding man because lets face it you never really want to wonder exactly how MANY axe wielding men you do have running around…